Making Your Move

[i]Dear Dr. Love,

I really like this girl named Kylie* and I pray that she may see the true love, sincerity, strength, goodness, and potential in me and find it in her heart to contact and communicate with me so that we may be friends and understand each other. Please pray that God may give her peace of mind, strength, courage, and a joyful heart.

Thanks and Best Wishes,
John*

* Names have been changed to protect the innocent[/i]

Dear John,

Thanks for writing. I may be wrong but it sounds like a case of a love that never had a chance to bloom because you never started any sort of friendship with her. Perhaps you are admiring her from a distance and are waiting for a sign from her before you make your move.

Well, John, the best part about being a guy is you [b]can[/b] make the first move without the girl giving you any signals first. It’s perfectly ok and demonstrates confidence to the girl that you are pursuing. This is always a good thing.

Praying for the right time to do things is good but your prayer request is that of asking God to make her see the good things in you. That sounds a bit passive. Remember, a faint heart can not hope to win the hand of a fair damsel.

You mention your hopes to start a friendship with her. You can start by saying hi to her and making small talk whenever you bump into her. Or hang out with your mutual friends if possible. I wouldn’t recommend you joining a ministry or a social group that you are not keen of just because you want to spend time with her. To thine own heart be true.

You sound like a nice person – someone that any girl would be honoured to be friends with. So, if you sense that this is the right time for you to make your move and start a friendship with her, go for it. Bear in mind that as you get to know her better, you will most probably discover that she may not be all that you fantasize her to be. That’s the danger on admiring someone from afar.

In conclusion, nothing will happen if you keep staying in the background. But when you initiate a friendship with her, you would stand a good chance of gaining a friend. I wish you all the best.

Dr. Love

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